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picture credit: ryyster

Sometimes, I hate myself. I hate myself for being so sensitive. I hate myself for doing mistakes. I hate myself for being a crybaby. I hate myself for being weak.

I hated all my flaws, my imperfections. I hated my own self. Sometimes, I don’t understand. I really don’t.

When sometimes, I open myself to other people. That’s when people judge me. They say I’m too shallow. They say, why am I thinking such things?

Yet I can’t understand myself too. They say those kind of things when you’re in the middle of chaos. They say those kind of things when you’re in a hopeless situation. No one to cling to.

I was in the midst of darkness. The devil keeps on pushing and pushing me all the way to the cliff. I kept on shouting for help yet no one would dare to save me from my agony. I was so desperate. The devil keeps on condemning me.

The moment I decided to gave up, that’s when Christ tooked my hand and lifted me up. His Light was like the waters that covered my sea of darkness. The blood that was shed on the cross keeps on reminding me that He loves us so much He gave Himself for the remission of our sins.

Right now after experiencing those sufferings, I found myself in the arms of God. I was lost but now I’m found. Was a sinner but saved by God’s wonderful grace.

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